You know those people who you love to death and you would do anything for them but sometimes you just want them to stop talking and go away for a bit? Those people who are almost excessively silent in public but at home they talk peoples ears off? Those people that always have Really funny stories and when you have one, they have one too, and who ends up sharing the funny story? Not you! Well, from experience, sometimes (but Only Sometimes) they make you want to cast some nerdy spell on them, (preferably one that actually works, because no, those wands and words from Harry-Potter-Ville don't work- I've tried. -kidding-) or maybe just ban them to Who-ville for a bit, someplace where their talking needs will be filled, but not- anyway, the point is, this is how I feel about my sister.
I've told you about her running plans and her weird diets- ok no, I haven't told you about all of those, sometimes I just have to laugh at her antics -and how she goes to look up a lot of 'How to get fit' articles, you know, that's ok, it's cool, when she...keeps it to herself. But telling me me that a cup full of spinach is one more calorie than a cup of lettuce? (Seriously? It's one calorie, who cares? Uber-random!) That eating a smaller breakfast of
1 apple = 90 calories
rather than
1 pkg. oatmeal = 240 calories (I know! Did you know oatmeal had so many calories! No! Joke! I don't really care!)
will help me eat less throughout the day since I apparently over-eat. :/ (I like food! It's good!)
Now she has decided that I need to help her with every one of them.
We have this thing right? Pinkie-promises, you can't break 'em, just cause its always been like that. Now every time that she decides to do some crazy diet or strange workout, she stalks over to me (yes! Stalks! Like she's a cheetah and I'm her prey!) corners me in an unsuspecting place, (like the bathroom- who does that!- or at one of the computers - really, they are in the corners of our main room) and says:
Sis: 'I'll never ask for anything from you ever again if you just become my running buddy'
Me: ...staring straight ahead silently...
Sis: 'Please please please please please?!'
Me: ...if mouse stays very still and doesn't pay attention, the cat will get bored and go away...
Sis: 'Just pink-promise me okay? then I'll leave you alone!' she says, grabbing my pinkie and forcing it around her own. 'promise!'
Me: abandoning silence for a better man (and how could that be - John Mayer, Gravity) 'Uuuuuuugh fine! Now leave me alone'
Sis: 'Ok? Really, you'll do it?'
Me: nodding wearily
Sis: well that was easy, anxious to get more out of her deal than just a running buddy 'Okay! Running buddy! Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday...and then swimming on Tuesdays and Thursdays, okay?'
Me: thought she said she'd leave me alone... narrowing eyes at screen/nothing
Sis: 'AL-right?'
Such is my unfortunate life, always being haggled into doing more than I say I will- the thing is, lately pinkie-promises aren't as sacred, and now when she asks me if I'll at least back her up while she goes for the Atkins Diet I half nod while shaking my head vigorously on the inside.
